Have you ever felt when slowly most of your dream have faded away? I feel that way right now. Yes I will keep try any oportunities that I found. But somehow I just enjoy to be ordinary. I have said most time Life is too precious if just to be ordinary. But I think it will be more precious to have less dissapointment. I had a dream about post graduate degree. I had a dream about going around the world. But now they have left me.
I realize this perspective totally wrong. I permit may weak side dominate me is a nother mistake. But what I need right now is to have some break. I just want ordinary live. Less stress less dissapointment. One time in Junior High school I had made a bullshit in front of my friends. "At the time I will buy my first car few years from now, it will be a Ferrari." I said that time. My friends just smile. They had know since first time met me. I have too many big dreams. Sometime the dream is too wild.
But I just want to take rest. Take a break from put too many burdens in my mind. Just wabt to have a simple life. Enjoy comuting from home to office and vice versa everyday. For someday maybe just want to walk at side of river. At later time just want to just walk around to an expo. See unique items. Meet with various people. I will do those things until can regain my understanding about life preciousness.